The People Who Exit

I like using the train system. I use public transit at home, and I also take the time to use it while traveling abroad.

While on a recent trip to New York City, my family and I spent a lot of time using the train. The subway is easily the most affordable and efficient way of navigating a trip to this place in the world.

On one day, we took a fairly long ride from Coney Island, all the way through Brooklyn to our destination in lower Manhattan; a trip that can take up to an hour and a half depending on the day. That’s a long trip, but it’s about 85% cheaper than taking a taxi or an Uber. But a lot of people get off and on during a long journey. In fact, there wasn’t a single person who started the ride with us who remained with us until the end. People get on, people get off.

Life is like that, especially when it comes to our careers. Those who start with us rarely remain for the entire ride.

From Coney Island

It made me think a lot about the people in my life that I’ve met over my journey. I’m about midway through my career, and as I think about the different places that I’ve worked, I can think of so many people who have taken a seat beside me on my career track. So many of them have been helpful, and I’m fond of so many of them; but ultimately, for a variety of reasons, they exited at different stations. The same could be said of friends, neighbours, or people I’ve gone to church with.

Change is hard, and I miss people. That ache is a symptom of the noble quality we call loyalty.

“Why can’t these people just stay? Why did they leave me behind?” are the leading thoughts.

If it were up to me, everyone would stay on with me until I reach the retirement station. Except, of course, for the ones who smell bad, have bad manners, play their music obnoxiously loud, and have phone conversations using the speaker.

The career train ride metaphor breaks down very quickly when I remind myself that I too am another rider on someone else’s route. For a variety of reasons, I too have exited at a stop along a colleague’s or friend’s life. I made other exits along the way because I wanted to learn, gain experience, and stretch to my full potential. If all goes well, I’ll continue my journey forward to wherever life is taking me next.

I also carry the truth that most people want me to have the best journey possible and are happy to see me take on new challenges. And… there are probably those that cheer silently when I get up to leave. That’s life.

In the meantime, the goal is very simple: be a good fellow rider. Bring your best to this station; be kind, considerate, and give your relationships the focus they need in the moment.

It’s easy to take the current riders around you for granted. I am by nature a strategic leader, and I’m usually thinking several stops ahead; but the people around me in the moment are the ones who matter most. When one of my team members makes the decision to move forward with their career, I cheer them on in their new adventure. Maintaining this perspective is healthy and makes me a better rider.

Thanks for reading, friend; keep riding.